Debby Over Seas : November 2013

If you're looking at the title and thinking, "Damn that's going to be insightful!" I'd turn back now. Maybe watch Harry Potter or National Geographic's Into the Deep. That's good stuff right there.

This is not me saying at at the ripe age of 26 I am now the all mighty and knowledgeable DEBBY! Because, in fact, its going to be the complete opposite. The past year has seen a lot of change in my life and I came to realize that I know almost nothing about being an adult. This is a brief rant of sorts about what I've learned in the past year and how I've coped with being comfortable knowing nothing.

Dinner Over The Sink

I never really understood why they portrayed single individuals in movies as always eating over the sink, but I kind of get it now. Though things have changed and I now really enjoy preparing a meal and sitting at my table, in the past year I cant count the amount of times I ate by the sink. Its wonderful, have you done this? Granted I had small apartment and standing by the sink also meant standing by the fridge, bathroom, stove, and front door, it was also just WAY easier than meandering over to the table and eating. My poor table houses my things, lonely and engulfed in needless items, until people want to eat on it. I cant say I've completely changed, but I have taken a turn toward sitting and eating at my poor lonely table.

No One Ever Taught Me About Towels

Something you may have never considered until you hit a certain age is your preference for towels. Seriously, if your still 23 and living through that year of misguided weird decisions you think are going to drive your future into greatness...right after you go out this weekend and get hammered and spend the next three days recovering, then you have no idea what I mean. If you have hit 25 or progressed past this you have gained some insight and understanding into the idea that you have some sort of preference for what type of towel you use. Those of you who know this feel are probably laughing because you know what I'm talking about and know that this specific towel is is pretty sweet, as far as towels come.

No One Cares About Your Facebook Status

Facebook and the like has, in my opinion, drained people of their desire to communicate inter-personally and genuinely care about what people have going on in their lives. Im not trying to put down the social media society that we have grown into, but really, honestly, do you seriously like that status update ? Are you truly showing your connection to this person via cyber thumbs up in their general direction? I cant say much, I "like" things all the time! I'm not saying I don't do these things. I'm just stating that in the grand scheme of things people probably don't really care that you're listening to Justin Moore at 6 am whilst brushing your teeth, they probably are just happy you're alive and functioning. For me its not knowing that my sister is spending her time wanting to strangle her 10 year old or knowing that for some strange reason my mother spends an excessive amount of time with a small cow. Its the fact they you are alive and well and still able to tell me the strange things they do with their time that makes me happy, that makes me "like" what they do.

People Are Nicer To You When You Brush Your Hair

I can just imagine my mothers reaction to this title. Yes mom, I sense your laughter and believe me, I know you said "I told you so". One thing I have noticed in the past year and maybe its because Im in a fashion driven society of teacup women with perfect hair and flawless features, but people are a hell of a lot nicer to you when you brush your hair. Or do anything "presentable" with it for that matter. I have noticed that I can march out of my house in the exact same outfit Ive worn a hundred times, but for some reason people are more apt to let you on the bus first or open a door for you if your hair is looking kept. I haven't gotten the science of half brushed down yet, but give me time mom. Ill figure it out.

Simplicity Is A Good Thing

Moving almost every year since I was 17 has taught me a lot about the amount of junk we acquire as individuals. Even as I type this my awesome brother is housing boxes of my junk for me until I return from Japan. (Seriously Dallas I love you for that.) I have grown to have a greater understanding of less is more and working out the needs and wants in my day to day. Do I NEED to eat an entire bag of gummy bears in one sitting. Most health professionals and probably again, my mother, would tell me no. But does this stop me!!!! Well sometimes, but all in all I try to think about my choices a little more this year.

Owning A Suit Is Better Than It Sounds.

Moving to Japan has taught me that there is a professional look and there is what I thought was a professional look. Lets just say I was WAY off. Maybe more like that one kid at school who is always trying to bring back overalls and no one joins in, kinda off. Stop trying to make overalls happen kid, you are not and probably will not be working on a car during third period algebra, so please, invest in a belt to hold up your pants and move forward in life.
(Dont think I wouldnt still rock overalls. Im just saying they have lost their touch) It really is a grand choice though. Invest in a suit, even if you dont have a "suit" style job. Wear it on Tuesdays and wander into places strutting around in your fancy pants. Live it up man, life is short.

A Good Man Is Really Not That Hard To Find

I know as the saying goes that there are "no good men out there!" but I hate you break it to you ladies, maybe its you...? I am not by any means the all knowing profit about men, but I have gathered some insight through my short experiences in life that have led me to believe that you cant just expect a good man to fall from the sky, fix your sink, sweep you off your feet and carry you off into the sunset while whispering sweet nothings in your ear and telling you your dachshund is a beautiful princess (even if your dachshund is pretty damn beautiful) . Thats a lovely fantasy, really it is, but it most likely wont happen even though that would be cool! Can he also have a cape? If not buy that bad ass a cape!

I mean its the least you can do, he fixed the sink.

I had NO idea what it meant to be in a relationship in the past and though I cant say I know the complete mechanics of it now, I've at lease begun to look at the instructions. I am still to this day puzzled by people who stay in physically aggressive relationship or why most couples stay together in the first place when they outwardly hate each other. But in our modern tech driven society people seem to be more driven to hashing things out publicly on a social media site than sitting face to face like a adult and talking about whats wrong. I know I've made this mistake in the past and .....well I was 23, so essentially by definition, I was an idiot. No offense to all the 23 year olds out there, but take a look at your last Facebook post, if it has anything to do with drinking, your "totally awesome weekend", a relationship problem or you have used a # symbol for anything other than identifying that you will then proceed to use a set of numbers, you're still on your way to not being a idiot. Dont worry, we've all been there, you'll survive. But there are good men out there.
The definition of what make a man a man is a strange idea to behold in the first place. Shouldn't what makes a man a good man somewhat mirror what makes a person a good person? Feminist broo ha ha aside, really just treating people well and being a decent human being is a pretty good feature in a man. Or a woman for that matter. So drink it in people!!!! Be kind. Share your french fries with your dog, try not to be horribly offensive when you have an opinion and remember you are only human and so is he. So if you are looking for the perfect man, buy a hairbrush and if that doesn't make the magic happen, try just being yourself.

Finally

I'm Probably Still An Idiot and I Should Seriously Stop Trying To Make Toast

Lets just settle this all right away, I love toast! The type of toast love that trumps that swoony feeling you get after watching a Nicholas Sparks movie or that fearless way you dance like Kuzko from The Emperors New Groove when you find 20 bucks in your pants pocket while doing laundry. Hae I made my point? I love toast, but I'm dreadful at trying to make it. I'm a slave to the toaster revolution and I have zero ability, Roxanna can confirm this, to make toast without burning it.

Even just a little.

This small insight in to my ability to char bread leads me into my thought that at 26 I'm probably still an idiot, but I'm making progress. Life really is an interesting ride and until I took the time to step outside of my bubble of comfort, be alone and really think about why I do the things I do, I had no idea what it meant to enjoy this ride. I will most definitely make more mistakes and fall on my face from time to time. This is all part of finding out what life is about for us all. For example I now know I should probably lay off the winter sports, but I'm pretty sure I might still try out hang gliding. I've got a heck of a lot to learn in life about what it means to be a good person to those I love and a great teacher for the students I encounter, but like my experiences with toast...

Its not that its perfect every time, its that I haven't stopped trying yet.

Today Roxanna, Boris and I went for a lovely picnic with some of Roxanna's students from the adult English classes. The gentleman that organized the trip, Hidemasa, is one of my favorite community members in Japan. He is such a lively and happy man who is proud of Himeji and enjoys speaking English more than any other student.
We started our day being retrieved from the residency thinking we had a nice long hike in store for the day. So in thinking we were going to be doing some trekking, I dressed for the occasion... I felt very prepared. When we arrived at the mountain however, we came to find that we would be taking the lift to the top and not too much actual hiking would be involved, at that point I felt as though my super cool hiking shoes were a little out of place. No matter, I trekked along genki as ever feeling wonderfully prepared! We met several more students at the lift center from Roxanna's class and as it turns out many I knew from the community lessons at Shirasagi.

With a group of about 9 community members and the vigilant guidance of Hidemasa, we began our ascent.

The day started out with loads of laughter as the community members sized me up and talked about how extremely tall I am and the rather large size of my feet. This soon became the running joke of the day ans yes, in case you were wondering, I was the tallest person in the bunch. An apparent giant at 172 cm, one of the smallest men in the group took it upon himself to warn me of low rise walk ways along the path and cracked jokes at his own expense about not being able to see anything. Needless to say he had me in stitches most of the afternoon.
We spent a great deal of time wandering the mountain and at any point when we spent too long in one spot Hidemasa was quick to remind us that we were not at the picnic spot yet with goofy a "hurry up! Lets GO"
He then proceeded to crack jokes about the members being old and that it takes them too long to get up the mountain. The group was very welcoming and willing to share any and all information they had about the mountain and read signs for us along the way. We laughed the entire afternoon away and I enjoyed every minute of the walk.
When we sat down for lunch to my surprise some of the group members had actually made vegetarian friendly food ! I was so shocked and thankful. They are such amazing people! I had never even met them, but they knew a vegetarian was coming on the trip and they wanted me to be able to try the food. It really is such a wonderful and considerate culture of people. After settling in and eating a little, Hidemasa insisted we go around the group and do some self introductions, a great idea! I got to know each member just a little and watch as they laughed and joked with each other about their age and hobbies. They were so kind and it was easy to feel comfortable. I think the best part was when they got to Boris and Roxanna. They wanted to know everything about them and their relationship. It was so cute to watch Boris explain about how he met Roxanna and how the first time they met was "not romantic..."
After a short time the air started to cool and we headed off to the area where The Last Samuri was filmed. I learned a little about the buildings and as we climbed the stairs inside I was again reminded that I should probably watch out because I could hit my head.
There were a few tour groups there as well and we got to see a group writing in calligraphy. The community members explained to me that it was a very difficult tradition because they had to write 250 complicated kanji and it took time and practice to do. I dont think I could do it!
Our day wound down with a short trip to the pottery museum attached at the base of the mountain and I found out quickly that I am less than skilled in the art of spinning a Japanese top. As we left in the late afternoon it began to rain and the man whom has been warning me of low rises began to say I should get out of the rain because I will melt. He is probably one of the funniest people I have ever met. It was a wonderful day trip with a lively and happy group of Japanese people. I loved every minute of it and I hope we get to do it again soon.

Now for some pictures of the beautiful Autumn leaves on the mountain.
( I'm not good at taking photos...be warned)

This is just outside the lift area. I thought it was very pretty

Right up until a random man came up and took a picture of me. Its so weird how often people ask to take a picture of me.

I love this little stone guy. We compared feet sizes ;)

There are many statues on the way up the mountain and the community members tried to explain some along the way.

Roxanna and some of the ladies

We tried to gather for a group photo... it went well

Lead the way Hidemasa!!!

I like the grumpy looking man in the red sweater.

Hidemasa explained that these are guardians and they protect the mountain and listen to our wishes.

These stones are placed along the path. They have family names on them. Roxanna and I counted them once but I cant remember the number I think around 300